There is a ton of stress associated with being in a relationship. It’s hard to find someone who loves you for you, and when you finally do, it can be challenging to sustain that love.
Most people don’t want to admit it, but we all look for perfection in our relationships. We want our partners to be everything we’ve ever wanted, like being a sexy escort at night and more. We want them to be the perfect person, but unfortunately, that person probably doesn’t exist, as no one is perfect.
Relationships are complex enough as they are without putting unrealistic expectations on your partner. Here are certain ways to know that you might be barking up the wrong tree:
How You Expect The Person To Behave
But what if the real problem isn’t their personality? What if the real problem is how you were expecting them to behave? Know what creates unrealistic expectations in relationships and how you can change the mindset so that expectations are more realistic, not only for yourself but also for everyone else around you.
When you expect someone else to live up to your standards and desires, you can end up barking up the wrong tree. Figure out why this happens and what you can do about it.
It’s easy to get caught up in the idea of what your perfect life would be like. But it’s important to remember that relationships are not perfect. In fact, they’re messy and complicated.
Having unrealistic expectations on how a person should be typically will lead to utter disappointment, a lot of stress and even heartache.
Disrespecting Boundaries And Demanding Too Much
If your partner has asked you not to text them while they’re at work or not to call them at night because they need their sleep, respect those wishes because what goes on between two people stays between those two people. Don’t try to convince them otherwise or make them feel bad about themselves for wanting their privacy.Examples Of Unrealistic Expectations
You expect your partner to understand why you’re upset about something without having to explain it. You expect your partner to be able to read your mind, so you’re constantly disappointed when they don’t know what you want.
You expect your partner to always want sex just because you do. You expect your partner to be sexually experienced and knowledgeable, so it’s a huge disappointment when they make mistakes in bed.
You expect your partner to be exactly like you when it comes to likes, dislikes and opinions on things like food and movies, even though no two people are alike.
Are You A Means To An End?
There is nothing more satisfying than being with someone who loves you and respects you for who you are. If a lover or friend leaves, you might be sad and disappointed, but it wouldn’t change anything about you as a person. It would be hard, but it’s a normal part of life.
On the other hand, if someone treats you like a means to an end or uses you for their own gain, that hurts much more because it affects your self-esteem and sense of worthiness as a person.
This isn’t just true in couples relationships, as it applies to friends, too. A friend who puts you down or uses you is someone you need to distance yourself from right away. As long as they are interested in your life, you should keep them around because they’ll probably help you in some way or another.
But when that stops being true, when they start putting you down or treating you as less than human because of unrealistic expectations or being used as a means to an end, you need to cut them off entirely because otherwise, it only worsens over time.